- I have been banned since '04
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by Bryan Burk
I have been banned since '04. The story behind it is as ironic as it is funny however.
I had been working for Wal-Mart off and on for several years. It was a good way to bring in some little needed income while I was attending college. And although I never really cared for the job, I eventually found myself as a support manager working the overnight shift.
The job was filled with the same turmoil that most of us have come to expect from Wal-Mart . And eventually, after being screwed by the company on several different occasions, I decided it was time to move on.
But it wasn't enough for me to just quit Wal -Mart. I actually wanted to make an impression on my exit. One that would have coworkers talking about it for months after I left. I had already accepted another job, but kept it secret from Wal-Mart. I didn't think they deserved any notice. And I wanted to go out with a bang.
So I thought to myself, what strikes fear into the heart of Wal-Mart more than any other thing? My answer...Unions!
So, I decided to type up some union propoganda. And make it appear that a local union was not only interested in representing the Wal-Mart store, but also that several workers had already made contact with them. Then I brought them into the store and posted them in several places...including the break rooms and the vestibule.
There was a big buzz throughout the store for the next couple of days regarding the letter. And eventually I just couldn't keep my joke a secret. I knew I was quiting in a week, so I ended up telling several people who worked under me on my shift. They found it hilarious and urged me to make some post some more before I left Wal-Mart for good. Which I happily did.
Of course, it was eventually noticed that all of the papers were turning up on the overnight shift. And that led Wal-Mart into turning the heat up on the entire overnight crew. District Managers and Loss Prevention frequented the overnight crew 2 days in a row(something that had never happened in my three years there). And interrogations(at least that's what I call it) followed as they tried to find the source of what was happening.
Eventually, one of my guys gave up my name to them. He felt so bad about it that he actually called me and told me he had done it. It didn't bother me simply because I knew I was almost out of there anyway. So why not get banned in the process.
So I came to work the next night ready for it to be my last. Only, there was no one there waiting to talk to me. Nor was there anyone there the next night.
But the night after that was when it hit. I got called into the office. Sitting there was the DM, the Loss Prevention Lady, and our fat store manager.
They started off informing me that I was being terminated(which of course was no surprise to me). What was said next did surprise me though. They had decided to terminate me for theft, not because I had distributed union materials on company property.
Admittedly, my jaw dropped to the floor.
"Could Wal-Mart be this desperate", I thought, "to actually set me up for theft(something I had never done) just to get my unionizing butt out of their site?"
But then the DM specified.
"Well, actually it's time theft. You took a 19 minute break two days ago."
I literally laughed out loud. I couldn't believe their desperation. And I continued to laugh even while I was signing my exit papers.
And after everything had been signed and they were getting ready to escort me out of the building for the last time, I reached into my back pocket, pulled out about twenty of the union papers I had typed up, and casually threw them onto the table that the three of them were sitting around.
The look on there faces were priceless. And definitely worth everything I had gone through.